This is a copy of my weekly blog which I write for work and is published on the council's intranet.  The views I express in this log are my own, professional, views as the Head of Communications but do not necessarily reflect those of the authority itself.

3299048532

I have become a number.  I am obsessed with this number.  I can repeat it off the top of my head.  I am living, breathing and dreaming about this number.

I will explain its significance in due course.  I suspect you fear that given my ‘difficulties’ with the TV licence over the last few weeks that this is my new prison number for the free accommodation that Her Majesty has very kindly offered me in C wing at Armley jail.

Well, it nearly came to that.  Very nearly.

You’ll remember from last week that I had found a secret hiding place in the basement of Civic Hall.  This is so I could take shelter every time something that remotely resembled a TV Licence detector van came within a half-mile radius of the building.

Members of my team – dubbed ‘keep Andy out of jail operatives’ – were stationed at various windows in order to see approaching people and vehicles from all angles.  Naturally they did a sterling job in being eagled eyed.

But, dear reader, I feel I made a massive tactical and managerial boo-boo with my deployment of operatives.

Clearly, while they were keeping watch, I was a bit down on numbers in the office so it was left to me (when I wasn’t hiding) to answer the phone.  This was a mistake.  I thought TV Licensing would swoop in and try and take me out using some kind of vehicle brimming with aerials and high tech gadgetry.

Oh no.  Their methods were much more primitive.  They rang me.

Oh, how I wish I had ignored that ringing phone.  Oh, how I wish it had gone to voicemail.   Oh, how I wish I had never bought a ruddy TV in the first place.

Anyway, a nice young lady called Jessica (clearly this was a tactic to lure me into confessing to a lack-of-licence) was on the other end of the line.

‘Hello Mr Carter, I understand you’re having some issues with a TV licence?’

I thought I’d play it cool:

‘Umm, I don’t think so – what gave you that idea?’

‘Easy’, said Jessica.  ‘We read about it in your blog.’

Buggeration.  Caught red handed.

Jessica ‘kindly’ confirmed that Civic Hall was not licensed – despite me giving her every possible variation of the address and postcode.

I managed to buy some further time by assuring her that ‘I knew a man who could help me’ because I was ‘sure he knew where the licence was kept’.

(This is the same man several of you named in your messages of help.)

Next morning, I recounted my tale to a colleague and this is when my new best friends came into my life.

Bobby and Les from the corporate property management team.  They were the silver lining to my otherwise black cloud.  They’re now on my Christmas card list.

‘Don’t panic,’ said Les.  ‘We went and bought a TV licence the other day’.

Hallelujah!

And so there it is: 3299048532 – the number of our brand new, shiny and gorgeous TV licence.  You can imagine my delight when I called Jessica back.  I was able to fend off the might of TV Licensing with just an eight digit number.

So, the good news dear and loyal reader (who I’m sure would have set up a Facebook page in order to campaign for my release from jail); I am spared a spell behind bars and can continue my work communicating to the people of Leeds.

But that’s not where this story ends.

Firstly, how did Jessica and her colleagues manage to get hold of my blog?  Do we have someone in our midst who is leaking my Log to the outside world?  Or perhaps TV Licensing has special tech that monitors the blogsphere?

And of course, there is one loser from all of this.

Big Bad Bob is going to have to wait a bit longer until he gets his new cellmate.  Hold on in there Bob!

I'm pacing up and down the house tonight.

This is because I'm expecting some news.

I went for a job interview today - to continue the role I'm currently doing - and the boss has said he'll call after 2000 with the result.

I've bitten all my bloody nails and I'm trying to break the habit.

Pace ... pace ... pace.

This is a copy of my weekly blog which I write for work and is published on the council's intranet.  The views I express in this log are my own, professional, views as the Head of Communications but do not necessarily reflect those of the authority itself.

I am writing this from the basement of Civic Hall.  I have hidden myself in a store cupboard in the bowels of the building.  This rather melodramatic measure seems to have become a necessity.  My colleagues in the communications team are stationed at various windows in the building which allow them to see people and vehicles approaching from all angles.

I’ve got them watching for TV detector vans.

I rushed down here yesterday afternoon when the alert was sounded; but it turned out to be a false alarm.  My colleagues had mistaken a window cleaner’s van for an official vehicle.  Apparently, from a distance and through the rain, the ladders on the roof ‘looked like a large aerial’.

I’m in my hiding place again now because we saw a truck with a satellite dish on its roof.  It could be innocent, but frankly I can’t take the risk.

If you didn’t read last week’s Captain’s Log you’ll probably wonder what I’m on about.  Here’s a quick reminder.  I bought a TV for work.  TV Licensing wrote to the council to say we didn’t have a licence to watch it.  I’m trying to track one down in order to keep the authorities at bay and to prevent my immediate imprisonment.  I appealed for your help – dear loyal, trusted and loved reader – through this Log.

And, you’ve done me proud.  Here is just a selection of your words of support and wisdom.

Let’s start with an email from Richard:  “There are two TVs in the members dining area and Civic Buildings are responsible for them I assume. I used to buy the TV licence for these when I was responsible for members services and the dining area.”

OK – that’s encouraging.  Good.

Now, here’s what Linda sent me:  “Before I get your hopes up, I am not in possession of the piece of paper you seek to keep you out of trouble (ahh, shame). I just want to forewarn you of the TV licensing tactics that you, or the council, may be subjected to if we can't produce the document they require.

(Oh goodness!)

”We didn't have a TV for 3 years when we moved to Derbyshire and we were harassed constantly about not having a licence. We wrote the usual letters for the first 6 months eventually inviting them to come to the house to see for themselves.

”We then received a card through the door fashioned in the style of a ransom letter with the threatening message "we know where you live". This was initially a cause of concern until we turned it over and realised that it was from our friendly TV licensing company. We took the card to the police asking them what they thought of it. They looked at it very seriously ..... until they realised it was about the TV licence - then they weren't interested.

”We continued to receive letters which we ripped up and sent back in tiny pieces - by the end of the 3 years, they stopped sending us mail.

”Apparently, our culture cannot comprehend that life doesn't depend on us pointing ourselves at an electronic box every evening - good luck with this one.”

Ah, that’s not such good news.

Here’s Claire’s contribution:  “Don't think there is such a thing as licence for the whole council but here at St George House we are "legal" in more ways than one in the fact that we have a valid TV licence that covers these premises. So if you are looking at getting it replaced with a licence for the whole council can you let me know.”

Umm, OK.  I will.  Having a licence now would be helpful though! ;-)

The final word goes to Lisa:  “I just had to say that was the best blog I have read in a long time! If there is a Chief Strategic TV Licence Procurement Manager post going spare, I would love to apply!”

Well it’s not for me to create one; but at this rate, we need this person!

Thanks for your contributions.  I feel I am now at least a couple of steps closer to tracking down a licence.  In true ‘Crimewatch’ style, several of you have independently named one specific person I should speak to, but I’m not going to name him in case he does a runner!

Onto other news now then.

The bin strike continues and is now into week three.  I won’t say much about it though; apart from the fact that my colleague and I have made it into the national press!  Last week, the Independent newspaper concluded that we ‘had orchestrated an aggressive public relations campaign’.  Praise indeed!  Shame then that the same newspaper used a picture on its website with the caption ‘[here are the] overflowing bins in Leeds’.  If you looked closely, you could just see the logo of one … Westminster City Council.

Cheeky beggars!

Finally, I had the pleasure of catching up with the council’s award winning worker Stuart Simmons last week.  He was special guest at an awards ceremony for colleagues in the resources directorate.  I had do a ‘Parkinson style’ interview with him.  It was fun and we had a few laughs too.

It was a great occasion and lots of people picked up well deserved awards.  I said at the time that it was fantastic to be there, because these kinds of events generate so much good news material and prove there is lots of great work being done in this amazing organisation we’re all proud to work for.

Congratulations if you were nominated or presented with an accolade.

This is a copy of my weekly blog which I write for work and is published on the council's intranet.  The views I express in this log are my own, professional, views as the Head of Communications but do not necessarily reflect those of the authority itself.

I fear, dear reader, that this may be my last Captain’s Log.

I say this because I discovered yesterday that the authorities have finally caught up with me.

No, not over that unpaid parking fine from Scunthorpe in 1996 - this is much more serious.

It seems I have inadvertently dropped the council in it and it’s all because I bought a new TV for my team so that we could monitor Homes Under the Hammer, oops, sorry, I mean Look North and Calendar.

These days, when you buy a TV you have to give your address. Of course, the shop has it if you order on line (in my case), but the cashier will ask for it if you buy in store.

This is so the nice people from TV Licensing can make sure you have paid your subsidy to the BBC and can watch Cash In the Attic legitimately.

So then, my purchase of an LG flatscreen triggered this process and TV Licensing have duly written to the council to enquire about the aforementioned piece of paper that proves we’re legal.

The trouble is … it seems we're not. Or at least that’s what TV Licensing reckons. It says we never have been.

Gulp!

Now, I’m sure we probably do have a licence somewhere – but no-one seems to know where and trying to track down a piece of paper that small in an organisation this big is a bit like finding a needle in a multitude of haystacks.

That’s where you come in dearest and most loyal reader.

It’s just possible you could save my life – as the kid used to say in the Yellow Pages TV ad (you know, the one where he has a party and damages his parent’s antique table and is using the Yellow Pages to track down a French polisher).

I am convinced that somewhere in this great authority we have an operative who is either partly or wholly responsible for the council’s TV licence. You/they might be called something like ‘Head of Storing the TV Licence’ or ‘Chief Strategic TV Licence Procurement Manager’. If you know who this most amazing, brilliant, talented and valued colleague is, please let me know.

Urgently please.

Of course, I understand that this person is going to be getting me out of a potentially sticky situation here, so I appreciate that they will need a little incentive to encourage them to come forward.

So here’s what I’m proposing.

In return for you keeping me out of Armley prison and from becoming Big Bad Bob’s cellmate and ‘plaything’ then I’m prepared to fend off the Tax Payers Alliance on your behalf when it publishes its annual list of the silliest council job titles later this year.

I’ll also let you come and use my shiny new (and troublesome) TV to watch whatever programmes you like.

My team recommend Doctors at 1345 and Murder, She Wrote at 1415. Top Gear is also on Dave at 1100 if you're a bit of a petrol head. LOL!

I look forward to hearing from you asap.

This is a copy of my weekly blog which I write for work and is published on the council's intranet.  The views I express in this log are my own, professional, views as the Head of Communications but do not necessarily reflect those of the authority itself.

Firstly this week a big ‘shout out’ to James Tatler who works in Civic Hall.

James told me last week that he had recently ‘discovered’ my blog and that he thought he was ‘good’.  ‘Excellent’ I thought – someone else who likes it.

Then James said he thought that I should have mentioned his birthday in it.  Obviously, I didn’t know about this important event otherwise clearly … ahem, I would have mentioned it for sure.

So James, Happy Birthday for the other day.

PS: I’m not going to give ‘shout outs’ regularly, so no requests please.

OK, to business.  I’m writing this on the train at 2130 on Monday night as I make my way home to North Yorkshire.

I’ve been out tonight for a social dinner and drinks with a former radio colleague of mine, who is now working in Leeds.

We spent time arguing about whether Chris Evans would do a better job than Terry Wogan when Sir Tel hangs up his breakfast headphones at the end of the year and we chatted about the ‘good old days’ when local radio newsrooms had team of 13 or more reporters and the adverts didn’t get in the way of the news.

Very quickly, the conversation came round to the issue of the bin strike.  My former colleague lives in Leeds and his bin is due to be emptied tomorrow.

I suspect he deeply regretted ever saying: ‘So, I guess my bin won’t be emptied tomorrow given the fact all the workers are out on strike …'

Of course, I went full-throttle into my spiel concerning the council’s position with regard to the bin strike.  The talks that have been going on, the 18th month pay protection and the whole equal pay issue etc etc.  I won’t bore you with detail.

Anyway – one long monologue later, I’d put him well and truly right!

This made me think of two things.

One - clearly, some of what we would consider to be misleading and perhaps even false claims made by the unions have made it into the mindset of Mr and Mrs Joe Public.  It would suggest the union spin machine – which has been cranked up to the max – is having an effect.  That’s worrying.

Two – I now realise I am never off-duty.  If I can defend the council I will, especially if someone’s got it wrong about us.  I even found myself explaining the bin strike to my mum the other day.

For the last three days we’ve been countering every claim made by the unions.  To be honest, it has become a bit like a ping-pong match.  Every time the unions have pinged, we’ve ponged back.

But now, I feel we’re at a bit of a stalemate.

If this was a trench war, we’d be staring at each other across no-man’s land.

Councillor Richard Brett and I went down to the Calendar studios earlier tonight for his on-the-sofa session with Duncan and Christine.  We agreed on the three key messages to get across (they were much the same for all the interviews he’s done today).  As a result it’s all getting rather repetitive.  I suspect Cllr Brett is as bored saying, as I am hearing, the same things over and over again.

But as any one of my former commercial radio sales colleagues would say: ‘repetition builds reputation’, so I suspect we’ll be banging on about on the same issues for at least the next few days.

This is a copy of my weekly blog which I write for work and is published on the council's intranet.  The views I express in this log are my own, professional, views as the Head of Communications but do not necessarily reflect those of the authority itself.

I’ve struggled to decide what I want to talk about this week as there’s so much I could write about.

The trouble is that it’s all a bit depressing.

So, I’m going to start with some exciting news. It seems our little communications team is on the national radar. Firstly, because of the fantastic work that my colleague Phil Jewitt has been doing to tackle the branding and identity issues we face, he’s been asked to speak at conference in London.

The great and good of local government communications from across the UK will be there and it’s a fantastic opportunity for Phil to talk about the work we’ve been doing and of course highlight Leeds City Council itself.

Meanwhile, I’ve been asked to do a guest lecture at Leeds Met University. I’m ‘allowed’ to talk about what I like; but I’ve not yet decided what the topic should be. I need to fill 45 minutes and take questions at the end as well. Again, this will be a good opportunity to talk up all the exciting things that are going on here.

Right, so that was the good news – now here’s the more depressing bit.

I’ve finally finished reading the book Flat Earth News. This as a result of spending the weekend at my mum’s house in Hampshire and her refusal to let me watch X Factor on the big TV in her front room (she wanted to watch a period drama).

Flat Earth News is all about the distorted facts and misreporting that goes on in the media because of national agencies (such as governments and the CIA for example) feeding untruths to journalists. It makes the point that sometimes these untruths end up being treated as fact because they are repeated so often.

The worrying thing is that it seems too many reporters these days are accepting one source for their story and are not bothering to check the facts.

For instance,one of our local journalists ran a very emotional piece the other day which was very critical of the council and contained a number of major inaccuracies. However, the first we knew about it was when we saw it on the TV! When I spoke to the editor about it my first question was ‘when exactly were you going to call us about this story so that the facts could be checked – and – give us the opportunity to reply?’

She ‘wasn’t sure’.

OK, so we got our right to reply eventually, but it was a week later and then we only had about 90 seconds to explain what is a very complicated issue.

I can see the poacher has a much easier time of it than the gamekeeper does.

My mum tells me that I was a bit of a cheeky kid when I was younger.

As I climbed the highest tree in the garden, she used to shout from the patio: ‘don’t come running to me if you fall out and break your leg!’

My response was always: ‘how can I come running to you if I’ve broken my leg?’

No doubt that retort cost me a slap when I was back in range of my mum’s hand (she wouldn’t be following me up the tree) but I can’t remember exactly.

Anyway, today, I have a new twist on that phrase.

It’s ‘don’t come running to me if you ignore my team’s professional advice and the local paper chews you to pieces and then spits you out’.

OK, that’s perhaps not as punchy as the broken leg version but it’s relevant.

There is someone in the council who has decided to ignore our advice on how a particular issue should be handled.  We recommended that at the very least a news release should be issued to help explain our position.

While acknowledging the fact that I’m biased (one of my press operatives wrote it); I do think the proposed release explained the situation well and made it clear why we are considering the options we’re considering.

‘No!’ came the response.  ‘I don’t want to go proactive on this’.

We weren’t really able to argue.  This person is in the kind of position where they have the final call on what goes out in their name.

So then, today, I couldn’t decide whether to roll my eyes in exasperation or ring the person and say ‘I told you so!’ when it was brought to my attention that one particular media outlet has got this issue between its teeth (like a dog with an especially juicy bone) and it has been chewed to death.

The result isn’t nice and the piece isn’t at all complimentary.

Frankly it’s bloody frustrating.  On the one hand I’ve managed to get the director of children’s services to stand up and talk openly about some very serious issues facing her department; yet on the other hand we can’t issue something about a much less sensitive issue.

I call it my ‘brick wall moment’.

You know … it would be easier and a more productive use of my time to bring in a brick wall and smash my head against it.

I'm good me. Or, if you're from Thornaby: I'm 'class'.

[Handy translation for southerners 'class' = 'jolly spiffing'].

Yesterday I tweeted about getting a story on the front page of one of our local newspapers. It was a good story, written well by the reporter and put us in a good light.

It was all about a news release I had penned with my own fair hand about the successful prosecution of two people from Leeds who had ignored planning rules and built a 'Berlin wall' in their back garden. The fine and costs totalled £18,000.

It started a few weeks back when our planning enforcement big cheese asked me whether I could help 'get a strong message across'.

'Of course I said, I'll get it as high profile as possible'.

You can imagine how pleased I was when it turned up in the local paper; but I got even more excited when it appeared in today's Daily Telegraph, the Express and on the Press Association wires.

I rang my man from the planning team to tell him how I had delivered what I promised. He thought it was pretty 'class' too.

This is a copy of my weekly blog which I write for work and is published on the council's intranet.  The views I express in this log are my own, professional, views as the Head of Communications but do not necessarily reflect those of the authority itself.

Last week we were setting up the sandbags ahead of what – in military terms – you might call a ‘defensive manoeuvre’ ahead of another not-so-flattering report about children’s services.

The good news is the ‘explosion’ that was the report I’ve just mentioned was well contained down to the hard work of one of my brilliant press operatives Emma.

Yes, there was coverage in the local media and the difficult questions we anticipated were asked; but we managed to keep it out of the nationals despite the fact the story was picked up by the Press Association.

Now then, there’s nothing to say the Sundays aren’t – right now – preparing a two page splash; and some other media organisation might be pulling together a Freedom of Information request, so the threat is still there.  But, for the time being we’ve kept a lid on things.

The reason?  Easy.  It’s because for this latest children’s services report we were open, honest, acknowledged that things haven’t been right, admitted that we’ve still got some work to do to make sure all the issues we’re facing are tackled, reassure the people of Leeds we’re taking this seriously and by saying ‘yes’ to every single request for an interview or statement.

In the past the council has probably been really defensive on issues so sensitive as this – but that’s not the way I intend to manage them.

My approach is to stand in front – not behind – the sandbags and take the media flak as it hits you.  In this case the flak was the difficult questions we were being asked.  Rosemary Archer did a great job of answering all of them and none were avoided.  As we were so honest and open I don’t believe there remain any unanswered questions and that’s a great position to be in.

So, a week on and the sandbags have been put into storage again.  However, we’re now getting ready to deploy the heavy artillery and big guns!

As I’m sure you are aware, some members of Unison and the GMB within the council’s street scene team have voted in favour of industrial action in a dispute, which they say, is over plans to cut wages.  We’re not too sure yet whether the action will involve a walkout or perhaps a work to rule.

Here’s why we need the heavy artillery: we’re going to have to fight two ‘battles’ with this one.  There’s the whole complicated issue of why the strike is happening and then there’s the issue of the disruption any strike is likely to cause.  This means two press officers, two directors and two politicians to handle the reaction to just one strike.  Our press ‘machine’ will have to be cranked up to the max!

On a much lighter note; I was able to enjoy some time last week doing what I consider to be the best bit of the job –meeting some of the great people doing great work for the people of our great city.

I was invited to attend an awards ceremony for adult social care staff.  Some were there to collect long service awards and others were being presented with accolades for the hard work they’ve been doing.

There were so many good news stories, I could fuel several months worth press releases.  The highlight was when I got ‘interview’ Stuart Simmons in front of the audience.  He’s the manager of Osmondthorpe Resource Centre and has won so many awards himself he’s running out of space on the mantelpiece.

My interview was fairly light hearted.  I established that Stuart’s wife is the main reason he gets out of bed to come to work in the morning; that his caring work started way back in the 1970s in Ghana; love brought him to Leeds; he likes Marmite (yuck!) and that even if he won a £1 million on the Lotto today, he’d still be at his desk the next morning.

I wonder how many other Heads of Communications got the chance to find that out about a colleague last week?

Finally, I asked for your feedback on the suggestion that we should ‘date stamp’ our publications so that readers know if a document is valid.

Here are two of the responses – from Harvey in ICT:

Would it be easier to have a version number (so long-standing doc[ument]s don't look like they've not changed in a decade) and allow a search on the intranet [or] Internet for version numbers, to help identify the latest copy and what the previous copies were?  One for Sharepoint when it comes along.

And Sarah in the Renaissance unit:

This really is a pet hate of mine! From personal experience, if I come across a document I want to know when it was published. Now if that was a while ago I might see if an up to date version existed. If it was more recent, I would feel confident using it to refer to. As it stands, a lot of our documents don't include a printed date so I have to ring around to try and ascertain how old it is.  And on a second print run you could have a similar reference that's found in books - first printed x date, reprinted x date. Putting a printed date on a document gives it a sense of context. Surely its better to know, than not know - then you can use your own judgement on it.  I'm not sure you need to include a valid until date - a lot of our plans and strategies are out of date for a while until they are replaced - but until a new one exists the assumption surely is that the old one is still the official version. A valid until date is probably more hassle than it’s worth.

Thanks to all of you for your comments.  I’ll discuss this with senior communications colleagues across the council as well.